What could have been
by grainipiot
Summary: Alternative chapter of my modern AU "Crawling back to you", chapter 33. This one doesn't affect the original fic, merely some fun. [yisuo, PWP, sexual content]


« Yasuo ? »

None had moved since they noticed each other in this dim corridor, heavy silence between them. A bit stiffling. Yi had no idea what to do right now, alert yet unsure. The latter looked at him like a spooked animal, equally uncertain.

From what he had seen and specially heard minutes ago, this confusion was understandable, no matter how hard Yi tried to forget. When he called the latter's name, he merely stared back at him, the smallest reaction yet no big move.

So difficult not to gaze lower. He knew. He heard him before in whatever sweet dream he had. Everything hinted to arousal in Yasuo's features and stance, far from relaxed. If there was enough light Yi would see indeed blown pupils and red cheeks. To be truly honest, the obvious bulge made it too clear.

It could explain why the latter got up, going to the bathroom or the kitchen, god knew where. Just, Yi was so lost in this situation. What could he do ? He called for Yasuo but he said nothing.

Impossible not to feel that tension, in a sexual meaning. He shouldn't know about it, this was too private and he never meant to stumble on that. Now there was no way to ignore it.

_Don't look_. This was madness, why did he feel like that ? No need to be flustered like some teenager. Maybe he got such empathy that he felt as embarrassed as Yasuo. Could be that.

A move was made, before he could even wrap his mind around this damned situation.

« H-Hey, funny seeing you here. Sorry, gotta move, still tired. » The latter spoke so fast, giving away so easily his state of mind about this. No surprise, he sounded slightly out of breath and needy.

_No, no. Not that word_.

Not even waiting for an answer, Yasuo bolted and went back to where he came from. At least, he tried to.

On reflex Yi urged : « Wait ! » No idea why he would ask him to wait and stay there. This was going too fast and nothing made sense.

Even more surprising, the latter froze, hand on the door's handle. Terribly silent, he didn't look at him. Yet he was still here.

Following instinct Yi stepped closer and as he did, Yasuo turned quickly with an almost panicked look on his face. The light from the bathroom filtered gently, a bit reflected in his eyes as he saw Yi approaching.

_What am I doing ? What are we doing ?_ This surely wasn't the smartest move ever. He knew too well Yasuo's fluster and his own, creeping up slowly. Was it worry that pushed him to close distance ? It was really moving to see the latter's impressed look when he joined him, sometimes going lower for less than a second.

« Yasuo ? »

What was the point of all this ? All he could read in his expression was light fear with a great amount of arousal. It made Yi react without thinking, slowly reaching for him. A sort of curiosity mixed with worry. If he had all his mind he would realize this wasn't a good time, not when Yasuo was so aroused.

Until he fully faced Yi, though averting his gaze. No luck or intentionally, it seemed more like taking a good look at him.

« Hey, are you alright ? » Shy question, completely out of the blue, just as he made a small gesture toward Yasuo, hand over his arm.

As quick the latter looked up, gasping lowly. It wasn't supposed to mean anything but Yi felt that spark. The meaning of all this. And dear god it made him blush fiercely. _Oh_.

On the other side, he withdrew. This wasn't so correct, probably he should just let Yasuo go away. Quite cruel to make him react like this but it never was his intention.

« I'm sorry. » Why was he sad to pull back like this ? Now he felt a bit funny about it, a sort of interest.

« No, no, it's…fine. » Said quickly, just before covered his face with his hand, definitely looking elsewhere.

It looked a bit painful, making Yi feel bad for him. This wasn't a game but no doubt he made it difficult for Yasuo.

« …it's fine if it's you. » Added from nowhere.

_What_. Suddenly everything took another meaning. Yes Yasuo looked quite aroused but what he thought to be simply the lingering relief of his dream, it might be something else. It dawned on Yi, hyperaware of their position, the risk of contact, both their state of undress. _Oh. Alright_.

He caused this. Or at least stopped it from decreasing. The idea of being actually attractive to Yasuo arrived, as incredible as it may sound. _Really ?_ Yet everything was here, too evident. Averting his gaze, that look devouring him shyly, the reflex to go away.

Everything clicked together.

« Do you…do you want me to ? » Speaking before thinking. This could be his most honest want at the moment. Curious, always. Why did his heartbeat picked up now ?

« Errr…like for real ? Not a joke… ? » That man burned for anything. Yi could almost feel it, so warm.

Far too aware of that bare chest just in front of him. At least it seemed mutual. He had no idea what he was offering to Yasuo but he didn't know neither.

« Yes. What do you want ? » A bit of confidence, this seemed to be needed right now.

« You. »

Silence fell again, as Yi registered this answer._ Me ?_ It grew heavy with meaning, more than his heart could take. He wondered what Yasuo wanted to say by this.

« Me ? »

Before he knew it Yasuo closed distance and pressed their mouths together, a quiet noise dying in this short contact. It dazed Yi, too sudden. Then realization. It was already over, the latter parting to step back and stared at him with soft desperation. Now he touched Yi lightly but never for too long, like holding back.

_Me. He wants me_. Dizzying thought overtaking his mind. If that wasn't obvious then really he would be damned.

Yasuo had a bit retreated, face hidden in his hands, leaning back to the wall nearby.

« Oh fuck, I'm sorry… »

Body acted before he knew it, returning to Yasuo within seconds and pressing him to the wall with care as he had him to look back.

« Hey, it's alright ! Is that…what you want ? »

One thing after the other until it became too much. So many things to register. The first was this move, a kiss. Yi struggled a bit uselessly, trying to find another meaning but it could only be for feelings. _For me ?_ The possibility filled him with new emotions, between odd joy and surprise. Would that be weird if it was for Yasuo ?_ No_. The answer came by itself, no hesitation.

Without any way around, Yasuo answered, a shaky nod along these words : « Yes…you, anything…forgive me… »

So Yi did what felt right, leaning closer until he could kiss him back. This was a whole new feeling, something he didn't know he needed until that instant. On reflex he seeked more, so glad to feel Yasuo opening up to him. At last he embraced Yi, taking him as close as possible. Pressed to each other like this, he couldn't miss the hardness rubbing against his hip. Air disappeared, suddenly breathless.

Parting, he gaze a certain gaze to Yasuo, as to gauge his reaction. He had no idea he had it in him, ready to jump into this new embrace. Where they meant to fit so perfectly ?

All this felt like a far dream. Waking up this morning he would have never guessed he would kiss Yasuo and find him so horny after a possible wet dream. Now they were right here, gazing at each other. Fear was still present in the latter's eyes but nothing too strong.

Yi realized he didn't care at all about circumstances, if it was right or not. It felt good and his heart raced just to be here in Yasuo's arms.

No more questions. Not even a thought sparred to time fleeing or anything else. All that mattered was this fuzzy joy he couldn't explain. Was it so strange to loved something newly discovered ? He didn't know he would need that so much, need Yasuo. Speaking of, he was still craving, shiest grinding against him.

« So you need a hand ? »

Was it all ? It was still a possibility. Mere relief, just for a time. After all, Yasuo could be quite needy for some time, maybe he just wanted to come. In any case, Yi would provide.

« Please… »

« Alright. Go on the couch, I'm coming. » A small order but this would be the best for them.

Yasuo stared at him with need, short conflict before he complied and let him go. As soon as he was free, Yi went to find lube in his bedroom before joining the latter in the living room. Really, what was happening ? From getting his clothes to getting lube to 'help' Yasuo, that was quite a stretch. His face felt hot, realizing what he was going to do. _Go, don't stop_.

When he saw Lily in the bedroom he thought this would finish bad if he let her wander in the flat. So last move, he closed the door of the living room when he arrived there.

So tense and restless, Yasuo was sitting on the open couch, looking at him as quick. Oh that dear gaze. Yi had no idea if this was indeed pure lust or something else. It squeezed his heart more than what a friend was supposed to make him feel.

Hand reaching for him, he held it in return and joined him on the couch. What a turn to find himself right here, with an aroused Yasuo by his side.

« There. What do you want ? » So unsure about what to do. Maybe Yasuo wanted this a certain way.

Yet any expectation was reduced to dust with the latter's answer : « Lie down, please…let me have you… »

_Oh ?_ Again, words had many meanings. Yi complied all the same, curious about what they would do. At first he thought he was going to provide relief to him but this might change soon. _He wants to fuck me ?_

As strange as it may sound, the idea seemed quite good. He wouldn't refuse that and even wanted it now. Why ? What could spark such interest now ?

Once more it didn't go like he thought. After indeed he lied back on the couch, Yasuo followed and stayed just above, a dear look on his face. This was far too emotional for crude need and it touched Yi deeper than he thought.

Not a single move made. He just waited for Yasuo to go on and do as he wished but it didn't come. Just a soft gaze over him, as if he was precious. _Was I wrong ?_ Was this more than relief ?

When he reached gently for him, the latter nuzzled his palm in a manner too affectionate to be lust. Heart pounding in his chest, Yi failed to remain composed, not in front of such attention.

Then the focus changed and Yasuo leaned to relish contact, face against Yi's neck. Far too vulnerable gesture. Hands traveled a bit over his body, from his shoulder to his chest. There the latter gave some attention, cupping urgently. Need was still present, never gone.

A lot of mixed signals. Yi was lost between this loving urge and the obvious arousal that brought them to this exact situation. Why question it ? He surrended and arched into contact when Yasuo teased a nipple, earning a breathy sigh.

« Yasuo ? » No idea why he called him. Maybe he simply needed to check this was real and not some dream or crazy fantasy.

Yasuo indeed looked up, a hint of worry in his gaze but it was fairly drowned in arousal.

« Sorry. You're just…so gorgeous, I can't take my hands off you. Do you have any idea how much you make me feel ? How you make me react when you get out of the shower ? » So talkative right now. Surely the worst was gone, back to his usual self.

A hand moved some hair off Yi's face then stayed over his cheek, far too loving. It made him feel more than he would imagine.

What if all this time Yasuo had been affected by him ? This latest words suggested it wasn't the first time. Yi was positive he saw him stare once but he didn't know to which point of desire it got. Between a mere gaze and a good eyeful, there was a world.

Curious, he trailed a hand over himself, exposed skin still a bit damp : « So you looked ? Did you like it ? »

How new to play on this. He had no idea Yasuo could find him worth lusting after. Was it just lust though ? His gestures screamed affection, feelings yet he didn't dare hoping.

This felt greatly ridiculous from his own point of view but it worked. So well. The latter's gaze gave away hunger, just for him to appreciate. _This is a yes_. He fought the urge to look away, suddenly embarrassed.

« I-It shouldn't be allowed. Have mercy… » Finished on a kiss, demanded with urgence. With that Yasuo silenced himself while taking a small part of relief.

Once he got enough he returned to his gentle attention, peppering kisses all over Yi's neck and collarbone. It was so sweet to feel then he moaned suddenly when that hand cupped his cock. Not even hard at the beginning but this sure got a reaction out of him.

Yasuo looked up again, this time full of curiosity and surprise for this noise.

« Cute… »

« You are. Now continue, I might think you want more than sex from me. » As much to return the attention than to check.

Yasuo paused above him, giving a certain look. _Was that wrong to say ?_

« I…I mean, yes. I thought it was clear. Fuck, I would never settle just for sex, I…care about you too much. »

Love. It wasn't said out loud but it was so clear in everything. Yasuo's gestures, his words, his gaze each time he looked at him. Yi couldn't take more, there were real feelings. For him. From his dear friend. _Oh god_. Life was strange sometimes and now he found himself getting emotional. _Do I…too ? For all this time ?_ It was far too early to ask himself that kind of questions and not exactly the right place. This would be for later.

In lack for a better reply, Yi pulled him down and kissed him deeply. This would have to do for now. Was it possible to kiss with new feelings ? He felt like he truly wanted to make Yasuo happy.

It went merrily until he felt his pants taken off, leaving him completely exposed. Instantly Yi parted, clinging to the latter a bit suddenly. A soft sound still escaped him when Yasuo brushed his hard cock with care.

Who was supposed to help ? It didn't matter anymore. If he was to lie back and take it, then so be it.

Next move was to spread his leg, giving access to Yasuo. A bit shameful but he burried this feeling, useless. Right there, spread for the latter, Yi gaze a small gaze. Yasuo went to sit between his legs and took some time to use the lube.

Not long before he got on prep work, trailing a slick finger around his rim. On reflex Yi tensed a little then relaxed or it wouldn't go far. That other hand stayed on him, soothing a bit.

Pushing a little then that was it, inside.

« Oh… » Not even Yi's reaction but Yasuo's, enraptured look on his face.

This was too much for Yi, he reached for the pillow and burried his face it in. How could he be ready for that ? Right in Yasuo's bed, opened with care and obvious affection.

If the latter minded, he said nothing about it, focusing instead on the task at hand. _He needs more…_ And yet Yi was the one directly pleasured right then.

Too caught up by the sensation of a finger probbing deeply inside him, he didn't notice soon enough the new stimulation, wet warmth over his chest. It made him feel slightly cold on this area, before it came back and now he understood it was Yasuo's mouth, tongue teasing flesh. _Ah…_ That moan ended up muffled in the pillow but no doubt the latter felt the way he tightened around the now two digits or his back arched taut as to meet him.

No time lost. These two fingers worked him open, stretching gently then scissoring. It made Yi react with increasing strenght, rocking back and clinging to the pillow. Yet one of his hands was taken, intertwined with Yasuo's. A lot of thought for a mere gesture. Meanwhile, the latter sucked on his nipple, playful. Now he would start to tremble lightly.

Pushing the pillow aside, Yi asked with little breath : « Now. You can take me now. » At the limit of begging but he wouldn't cross that.

However Yasuo seemed to keep on his small worship, adding a third finger that made the latter squirm strongly.

« Ah— Please, do it. You've been waiting… »

« A-Alright. Let's do this… » Not even confident. Yasuo sounded plainly affected by what he provided, like someone having difficulties to believe this right instant.

After rising shortly, his gaze lingered a bit on Yi's body, to finish by meeting his gaze. Oh such love, unvoiced but praised in gestures. He wanted to return as much, for this man made him feel so special.

A bit feverish looking, he paid attention was Yasuo took his boxers off. What a mess it already was, large stain of precum over fabric. Once it was taken off, he saw how the latter took some short relief, stroking himself with lube barely a few times but it made him gasp highly. Was it wrong to find this endearing ? _Maybe_. In any case, Yi wanted him. Clear like water. He wanted to be taken right there, to make him feel as loved as he gave it.

Gingely Yasuo went on top of him, very flustered expression that screamed of good will to do. Slightly scared and highly aroused, all attention on Yi.

« Wait. » In a breath, sudden idea.

That small pause was a yes, even more when he saw Yasuo's expression. So Yi followed his instinct and rolled them over, to finish on top of him.

« Oww… Oh, h-hello. » It seemed that he could barely put two words together, too much effort to focus.

Losing no time, Yi rose just a bit then guided the latter inside. Just the tip and already he felt like this was going to be short before the edge, holding back the best he could. A moan rewarded his work, hands settling on his hips.

Little by little he took more until Yasuo was fully sheathed inside._ Oh… full_. Harsh breathing but otherwise it was fine, light tremor running his body. Yi relished the instant, looking down to see how this went for the latter. He looked a complete wreck, fully blushing and visibly struggling not to take what his body craved.

Hand over his chest, Yi took as many details as he could. Like a dream. _We're fucking_. This seemed so unlikely but what did he really know of Yasuo's feelings before ? Innerly he wished he had known earlier.

Still, he wouldn't forget the reason of this morning and rocked back to make it pleasurable for Yasuo. No doubt he was probably a bit too tight. _It has been a while_. Soon enough the latter helped and thrust into him, each time making him moan for the depth reached. _Good…_ The pace was set, he could enjoy it.

Sometimes he caught himself gazing at Yasuo. Really, what a lovely turn taken. It never came to his mind to have sex with him but now that the occasion was there, it seemed the best thing in a while. The latter looked shaken, struggling to focus on anything as his moves grew rough. _He's close… ?_ This was quite understandable, it had been quite a morning for him. Yi sped up his moves, rolling his hips to find the best angle. Until that cock touched his sweet spot, making him cry out far too loudly for his taste.

« Damn, Yi… » Equally lost in this soft heaven, Yasuo pawed at him gently.

« Say it… » Air lacked so much, making his head spin a bit. It was too good to bother. Yi wanted to hear him say it again, say his name since he made it sound so good.

« I…I think I love you… » His voice broke, a sound close to a sob.

A lot more than what he asked but he would cherish it all the same. _Oh…_ His heart had another opinion, ready to give out too. Too much feelings at once, when he wasn't even supposed to feel that much. Was he really just a friend ? He looked at Yasuo right now and he could just acknowledge the soft ache in his chest, ready to bloom. Then next second he was sent reeling after a really well aimed thrust, on accident.

As answer he took Yasuo's hand and gave it a long peck, trying everything he could not to mess this up. Eye contact then the message was conveyed. He hoped. Something shone in the latter's eyes, soon to be identified as tears. So light, so beautiful, it trailed gently.

Another sharp rocking and he heard Yasuo cry out, abandon written in his features. _Oh dear_. Heat spilled inside him, the clue that indeed it was enough to get him off. Yi smiled fondly, glad to have helped. He still held the latter's hand, feeling it twitch during climax and clinging to him with rare emotion. Another short peck, to thank him.

Soon it calmed down and instead it made him realize how needy he got overtime. Yasuo had to pull out but he wasn't fully satisfied, rocking against him for the smallest stimulation. After providing relief, his body couldn't focus anymore.

« Please, Yasuo… » Maybe too needy, debauched but he didn't care.

Begging for anything, any kind of attention. He had done it, he had brought Yasuo to climax and now he couldn't do much by himself. Hopefully, the latter got enough awareness to help him, slick grasp around his cock that made Yi shake dangerously. Barely holding himself up, his arms threatened to give up and let him fall over Yasuo. Yet no care, he thrust urgently in that tight grasp, back arched until all he could feel was pleasure.

Yi actually came when two fingers dipped inside him again, filling him in less measure than Yasuo's cock but it was still good.

« Come on, Yi. You can do it. »

Orgasm rippled through him, powerful. Not really on purpose he clutched at Yasuo beneath him, in a manner that may leave red marks. Last moan of a long series then he collapsed, as simply as that.

When Yi came back to awareness, surely less than a minute later, he was carefully held. Head pillowed on Yasuo's chest, he tried to catch his latest memories.

It was good. Really really good. A hand went through his hair, a gesture so loving it made him feel again. _Mmmh…_

With awareness came also reality. _Oh no I'll have to go soon_. His soul cried a bit on this, it was so comfortable right there.

A short move made him look up, meeting Yasuo's gaze, oh so gentle. What he felt in this instant couldn't be made up, this didn't happen in one night. It squeezed his heart to realize that. What had been going on all this time ? Now indeed he could understand why letting go of Yasuo felt so wrong.

_No, stay here_.

Slowly he rose and leaned for a kiss. Deep, needy in affection and so well returned. All he could ask.


End file.
